Again with the Nazis. Zombie supersoldiers and UFO technology weren't winning the war so now they summon a sexy demon out on one of the Channel Islands, and perpetuate the 100% incidence of people getting more than they bargained for when raising demons. Protagonists soon arrive by kayak.

Hey this is turned out to be a real movie. I'd put off watching it for ages because the cover image strongly implied that it would be attack of the Waffen D-cup dominatrix vixen squad or something, but there's actually nothing like that in the movie. Even though I'm glad it's better than that, false advertising pisses me off. Every image of this movie on the internet is some kind of softcore Nazi porn. The marketers obviously think more people want to see that than the movie they actually made, so they stuck it on the cover with cruel disregard for all the poor little Nazi fetishists who would sit through the whole thing waiting for riding crop action that never comes.

But like I said, real movie. Nice vibe when they descend into that bunker full of grotesquely murdered soldiers and screams are echoing through the corridors. I especially dig today's demon. Some might complain that it's just your standard red medieval demon like you'd find dancing on a tin of Underwood sardines, but the classics are classic for a reason I say, and in this case the devil is definitely in the details. I'm usually not too bothered about monster prosthetics and face paint, but the combination here of the makeup, actress, and voice is just coolly demonic and creates an effect of androgeny that my searingly hetero brain finds a bit vexing for a second, like "that's gorgeous - wait is that a man?!" Don't worry though other men, it is in fact a sexy lady in a demon suit, and by suit I mean spray paint.

Demon eats a guy's head off, and boy did I like it. When it comes to gore I say if you can show it, definitely show it, but if you can't, don't try, and go for the artfully implied instead. In this case I'm afraid a graphic head-gulping scene would have involved some sort of giant stretchy mouth CG that would have looked like giant stretchy mouth CG. So they did it 70s style with a super closeup of demon face, slightly widened out to create a snake swallowing effect that's just beautiful, chilling, perfect. The eyes.

Complaints? Well I liked the dead German orally impaled with his own weapon; didn't so much like that it's a postwar Soviet rifle. Yeah I'm a World War 2 geek. I own books about supply logistics and field kitchens. Do I make fun of those creepy dolls you order from Korea? Anyway very minor thing yes, but how do you make a WW2 movie and not know what rifle to ram down a dead German? It's one of the most famous rifles ever made.

Also I think the director should have had the Nazi guy employ at least a modicum of German accent. He speaks such flawless English that my brain balked at first, like is this guy a British spy or something? They try to cover this by saying he's a linguist, but he's quite obviously a native speaker. In fairness, the Hitler haircut and arrogant attitude make him seem German enough; I'm just saying it wasn't perfect and professional actors can do accents. If only Werner Klemperer had been alive to play the role.

"Take him to the cooler!"